If you're reading this one day, please don't feel any obligation to respond.

I'm not writing this because I want a conversation.

I'm not writing this because I want another chance.

And I'm not writing this because I expect you to suddenly see things differently.

The time for all of that has passed.

This exists for one reason only: there are things I should have said when everything happened, but I didn't know how to say them at the time.

You may still disagree with every decision I made after reading this.

That's okay.

I just don't want my silence to be mistaken for a lack of thought, feeling, or care.

So if you choose to keep reading, read it only as the explanation I never managed to give.